Tasha Does Tulsa.

Come this time Sunday afternoon, I may or may not have deflated back to my normal size.

Because Saturday night, thanks to being asked to help judge the first round of the Back Alley Blues & BBQ Side Search, I’m going to eat beans. Maybe more beans than I’ve ever eaten in my entire life. Which, as a native Oklahoman, is really saying something.

Some of those beans could come from your kitchen, your genius, your innate sense of what is good and holy about a pot of brown, spotted legumes. And if I like your beans above all others, and if my fellow Side Search panelists like them, too, you could win a cool $1,000.

Some of which you might have to spend when I ask you if you’d pretty please make a Walgreens run to get me a bottle (or five) of Beano.

Wait – I think I’m getting ahead of myself here. That happens when I’ve been excited about something for awhile but haven’t really been able to say anything until just now. Let me back up just a tad – from the beginning, here’s what’s going on.

As if opening one of the best pizza places in town, a t-shirt shop, a public relations firm and a retro arcade that has been called the best bar in the state wasn’t enough, Blue Dome magnate Blake Ewing is opening Back Alley Blues & BBQ this April.

Back Alley is going to be a what-you-see-is-what-you-get type of place. On offer will be BBQ and blues music every night of the week, both inside and on its rooftop bar and stage. The food will be Memphis-style, dry rub barbeque with traditional Southern sides, and the restaurant concept is meant to highlight Tulsa’s rich history and current achievements in blues music.

True to Blake Ewing style, rather than play test kitchen all by his lonesome in search of the perfect recipes for his menu of sides, he’d would rather throw a series of giant parties in downtown Tulsa, host a contest and crowd source for the best possible formulae for beans, slaw and cobbler. The cook-offs will be judged equally by a panel of local celebrity judges, the audience and Blake himself.

The winner in each of these categories gets:

• His/her recipe featured on the menu at Back Alley Blues & BBQ;
• A thousand smackaroos;
• Instant fame and celebrity status;
• A high five from me.

Which is not that great of a prize, actually. I suck at high fives. I lack the hand-to-eye coordination needed to make the solid contact that’s a necessary part of all world-class high fives. Maybe your real prize here is that you get to teach me how to properly and effectively high five. Congrats in advance.

It’s easy to enter the Side Search. Simply go here, click on the contest you want to enter and key in your info. Ta-da! You’re now in the running for all that you’ve ever wanted and hoped for in this life. Plus, $1,000.

Side Search kicks off with the beans category this Saturday at 6pm. After the tasting and judging are over and the winners are announced and receive their awards, blues music will flow from the stage at the VFW until midnight.

Again, here are the details:

Back Alley Blues & BBQ Side Search: Beans!

When: Saturday, Jan. 22, 6pm-midnight
Where: The VFW Post just west of 6th and Peoria
Music: Blues tunes by Danny Buck, Scott Ellison, The Dustin Pittsley Band and more
Celebrity judges: Joe Kelley of the KRMG Morning News; Sunny Leigh of KVOO and me, in a plastic bib (a smock, actually)
Cost: The folks at Back Alley are asking for participants and attendees for $5 at the door to be given to the American Heart Association in memorial of Marcus Takach, who died from sudden cardiac arrest during the Route 66 Half Marathon in November.

The slaw competition is February 26; then, Tulsans will go head to head armed with nothing but courage and their best cobbler March 26. I’ll keep you posted on those. Because you’re not going to want to miss them.

I can hear your thighs screaming already. And they should be screaming – loudly. And with feeling.

See you all Saturday!

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